Posted in
being stupid,
high school,
humorous,
idiots,
prank,
wal mart,
yes my blog is back and going again
This was one of the stupidest-friggin ideas we came up with in high school. I can't decide which is more retarded, the fact that we thought of this or the fact that we actually did it. The kind of thing you look back on and say "what was I thinking?", stuff you'd never do again...
It all begins one night at a magical place called Wal Mart.
OK so... I don't know what got us started, I don't even remember when this happened (except to say that it was in high school). But one day, while at Wal Mart, I got the bright idea to grab a cart and start loading it with all kinds of garbage I had no intention of purchasing.
And the randomer the better: diapers, shirts, video games, shoes, a tire, paint cans, about a hundred sympathy cards, a huge box of crayons, that kind of stuff.
But I made sure not to grab anything perishable. So that way, even though it'd be hell to put everything back, nothing would be damaged or ruined. Matt, however, did not feel so limited and grabbed a ten pound bag of frozen chicken, which he buried under about five sleeping bags.
It was strangely enjoyable to push down the aisles grabbing anything and everything we saw, trying to be as non-chalant as possible. People gave us some pretty interesting looks and we tried not to laugh as we, two teenagers, pushed through with our overloaded carts practically sweeping things off the shelves by the dozens.
What eventually stopped us was that we couldn't add to the carts without items falling out, so we ditched them in the far corner of the building and left. Thinking how hilarious our "prank" was. (Juvenile, I know)
In fact, we had so much fun that we couldn't wait to do it again. Literally. So we drove to the next closest Wal Mart and repeated the experience. Cruising around the store loaidng up our carts with garbage, but we had to take it up a notch. So when we were done I got in line at a register, Matt--who didn't really understand what I was doing--got in line behind me. I had no plan, of course, and was flying by the seat of my pants. Mostly just amused at the entire situation, not sure what to expect. This really nice lady greeted me, she was the checker, and started loading up my mountain of junk into carts and ringing it up. Somewhere around $300 I made for my wallet and pretended to be searching it, though careful not to let her see inside it. But she was too busy putting my crap into bags.
"Oh gee, I forgot my credit card," I said. "I'm sorry. Maybe it's outside."
"Oh okay, no problem."
I nodded and left, marching out the store--somewhat curious to see what Matt would do. He later told me that the checker said she could ring him up. Less able to think fast on his feet he replied. "I also forgot my credit card," and hurried out of the store.
Once outside he got after me about leaving him high and dry, but mostly we just laughed. And wondered aloud how they'd handle the situation. Ultimately we got this stupid idea to switch jackets and put on hats (a ball cap and a beanie) to go back inside and see what was going on. We kept our distance, pretending to look at shirts in the nearby men's section, while spying on the isle we had just sabotaged. The manager was there talking to the checker, looking flustered and unsure what to do.
And being the sadistic kids we were, we left thinking how great it had been. "We totally pwned Wal Mart."
And somehow we got the the idea to hit another Wal Mart on the way home. I didn't feel like "upping the ante" and doing something even crazier, and I felt kind of bad about leaving the checker with two cartloads of crap. And Matt felt bad about the chicken he'd left under a mummy-bag. But despite these guilty feelings, we had time to do one more. So we invaded our final Wal Mart for the evening.
This one wasn't particularly eventful, but I made a game out of it by looking for items not for sale to add to my cart which was filled with a "slippery when wet sign", an orange vest, half of a shop vac, a plunger (yeah it was just laying out), a broom, a mop, and an unpacked box from off a pallet.
I did not try to ring these items up. So again I stashed the cart somewhere and slipped away back into the night.
The next morning we returned to the first Wal Mart we'd attacked, discovering that 10 hours later the carts we'd packed were still in the far corner loaded to the brim and covered with sleeping bags.
It all begins one night at a magical place called Wal Mart.
OK so... I don't know what got us started, I don't even remember when this happened (except to say that it was in high school). But one day, while at Wal Mart, I got the bright idea to grab a cart and start loading it with all kinds of garbage I had no intention of purchasing.
And the randomer the better: diapers, shirts, video games, shoes, a tire, paint cans, about a hundred sympathy cards, a huge box of crayons, that kind of stuff.
But I made sure not to grab anything perishable. So that way, even though it'd be hell to put everything back, nothing would be damaged or ruined. Matt, however, did not feel so limited and grabbed a ten pound bag of frozen chicken, which he buried under about five sleeping bags.
It was strangely enjoyable to push down the aisles grabbing anything and everything we saw, trying to be as non-chalant as possible. People gave us some pretty interesting looks and we tried not to laugh as we, two teenagers, pushed through with our overloaded carts practically sweeping things off the shelves by the dozens.
What eventually stopped us was that we couldn't add to the carts without items falling out, so we ditched them in the far corner of the building and left. Thinking how hilarious our "prank" was. (Juvenile, I know)
In fact, we had so much fun that we couldn't wait to do it again. Literally. So we drove to the next closest Wal Mart and repeated the experience. Cruising around the store loaidng up our carts with garbage, but we had to take it up a notch. So when we were done I got in line at a register, Matt--who didn't really understand what I was doing--got in line behind me. I had no plan, of course, and was flying by the seat of my pants. Mostly just amused at the entire situation, not sure what to expect. This really nice lady greeted me, she was the checker, and started loading up my mountain of junk into carts and ringing it up. Somewhere around $300 I made for my wallet and pretended to be searching it, though careful not to let her see inside it. But she was too busy putting my crap into bags.
"Oh gee, I forgot my credit card," I said. "I'm sorry. Maybe it's outside."
"Oh okay, no problem."
I nodded and left, marching out the store--somewhat curious to see what Matt would do. He later told me that the checker said she could ring him up. Less able to think fast on his feet he replied. "I also forgot my credit card," and hurried out of the store.
Once outside he got after me about leaving him high and dry, but mostly we just laughed. And wondered aloud how they'd handle the situation. Ultimately we got this stupid idea to switch jackets and put on hats (a ball cap and a beanie) to go back inside and see what was going on. We kept our distance, pretending to look at shirts in the nearby men's section, while spying on the isle we had just sabotaged. The manager was there talking to the checker, looking flustered and unsure what to do.
And being the sadistic kids we were, we left thinking how great it had been. "We totally pwned Wal Mart."
And somehow we got the the idea to hit another Wal Mart on the way home. I didn't feel like "upping the ante" and doing something even crazier, and I felt kind of bad about leaving the checker with two cartloads of crap. And Matt felt bad about the chicken he'd left under a mummy-bag. But despite these guilty feelings, we had time to do one more. So we invaded our final Wal Mart for the evening.
This one wasn't particularly eventful, but I made a game out of it by looking for items not for sale to add to my cart which was filled with a "slippery when wet sign", an orange vest, half of a shop vac, a plunger (yeah it was just laying out), a broom, a mop, and an unpacked box from off a pallet.
I did not try to ring these items up. So again I stashed the cart somewhere and slipped away back into the night.
The next morning we returned to the first Wal Mart we'd attacked, discovering that 10 hours later the carts we'd packed were still in the far corner loaded to the brim and covered with sleeping bags.
